Okay, so valiant asked me to write a snippet of Nick Jonas as the crossroads demon from Supernatural, so... CROSSOVER FIC? This really has no point other than the OMG factor of tiny little Nick Jonas power-tripping at big, burly Dean Winchester.


Poor Unfortunate Souls. Dean Winchester, demon!Nick Jonas, PG-13, 1,200 words. Nick may have spent the last five years out of the pit, but he'd still recognize Dean Winchester anywhere.

( Nick Jonas and the Administration... OF HELLISH TORTURE. )

I'm in the process of giving my LJ a makeover, so this seems like a good time to do some DEFRIENDING AMNESTY!

Interests change, fandoms change, blah blah blah. I still love Supernatural, but I've really phased out of the fandom at this point. I don't think I'll be posting about it much, and the odds of me writing more SPN fic are slim. Given that at least 80% of my friends-of list is SPN fans, I feel like I'm probably just putting people to sleep with my Jonas-related porn. Which makes me uncomfortable.

So: please feel free to defriend me if Nick Jonas is not relevant to your interests! No hurt feelings or anything. Quite the opposite, actually -- I hate the idea of clogging people's flists with stuff they have no interest in. We'll always have 2007!

Demonic Nick J endorses this message:



LOL FOREVER. I REALLY LOVE THIS. Demon eyes look so natural on him. Thank you for this masterpiece, valiant.

It feels like it's been forever since I've had proper internet time! One of my best friends came to stay with me for most of November, and another good friend just moved back to my city, so the last three weeks have been a total blur of social stuff. WEIRD. I always feel like a huge creeper when I'm hanging out with people I genuinely like, yet find myself daydreaming about A) gay porn, B) hot celebrities, and C) the gay porn I'm going to write later about hot celebrities. IDEK.

The upside is that I got to convert one of my friends to the Jonas cult. It wasn't even entirely my fault -- the friend who just moved back to SF is a very gay hipster boy with a pop culture obsession that rivals my own. After we spent nearly an hour discussing Joe's hair, the hilarity of JONAS and the unbearable hotness of Nick, our other friend was like, "FINE, WHATEVER, LET'S WATCH CAMP ROCK." By the time she left my house she had seen the entirety of JONAS and nabbed all of their albums from me. ~Mission accomplished~.

Anyway, I hope everyone has had a good Thanksgiving! Last year I not only had the flu, but was stuck on my ghost town of a college campus with zero company. Thankfully this year has more than made up for it; I watched Christmas specials with my mom last night and ate amazing food today with a not-half-bad branch of my family.

I think I'm going to try to write some CHRISTMAS FIC tonight. I have never written holiday fic before! Not ever! But I'm feeling the holiday spirit, and it's making me want to write about cuddly incestuous make-outs in the warm glow of a Christmas tree. I'll avoid questioning why that feels like a logical way to channel said holiday spirit.

You know what I really hate? When you have a certain line or scene or something in your head, and you're like, "THAT'S REALLY COOL, I'M SO AWESOME," and then you're like, "...wait, did that come from something else?" and proceed to second-guess yourself into a black hole of uselessness. Ugh, I HATE it, because I can never figure out if I'm subconsciously ripping off a TV show or book or something, so I can't bring myself to use whatever that cool idea is.

Another thing I kind of hate: seeing slash everywhere. I mean, I've been in fandom for nearly ten years now, so this is an old and deeply entrenched problem. But I was watching the Daily Show a few days ago? And there was this funny back and forth bit between John Oliver and Jon Stewart (like there always is)? And they kept cracking each other up, and as it was going to commercial break they gleefully high-fived and it was REALLY CUTE. And for some reason my first thought was, "AWW. John Oliver has replaced Stephen Colbert as Jon Stewart's boyfriend! That's so sad!" WHY AM I LIKE THIS.

Sigh, anyway. I wrote some Nick/Joe sex pollen stuff for the current boyfriends_fic challenge, which I will eventually title and repost. But for now it's over here while I think about adding onto it. (There's a second chunk of it if you scroll down. Mm, dubcon blowjobs!) I'm not sure what it is about commentfic that makes me comfortable with writing cliches. I mean, I always thought wingfic was one of those things I would never, ever do, and then blindfold_spn popped that cherry. Now I'm writing SEX POLLEN. I don't even know what the next rung on this ladder is. Body-swap? Fuck or die? There's a drain, and I'm circling it.

This seems like a fitting time to discuss how I recently rented Camp Rock. ( Thoughts. )

In other semi-awesome, semi-pathetic news, I recently started teaching myself the guitar. That's the awesome part; the pathetic part is that I did it so I could feel more validated while writing fanfic about musicians. But OH MAN, I REALLY REALLY LOVE IT. I keep chasing friends and family down and making them listen to me play random chords. I discovered strumming patterns yesterday and nearly lost my shit. I want to learn every crappy 90s song EVER. If I'm not playing at least one Third Eye Blind song at an open mic this time next year, hell will freeze over.

HAHA. I leave town for THREE DAYS and my fandom suddenly explodes. Apparently Joe has decided to look like a boy now? And Nick has inherited his Ryan Ross wannabe wardrobe? And I'm going to have to swallow my bile and purchase an album by NICK JONAS AND THE ADMINISTRATION next year? WHAT IS GOING ON.

Okay, in all honesty, I have kind of been waiting for this ever since those rumors about a solo project started floating around this summer. It is exactly the kind of thing Nick Jonas WOULD do, retarded name and all. But I'm suddenly really curious about the details. Is he contractually obligated to only release shit under the Hollywood label, or is it possible that this music isn't Disney approved? I'm really hoping for ~Nick Jonas unplugged~ or something, because I think he's at his best when he's not doing those cheesy stadium rock anthems. I just want more jams in the vein of "Lovebug" and "Turn Right". Unleash the samurai sword of accoustic singer/songwriter awesomeness, Nick J! Do it for me! Their MySpace blog about the whole thing isn't exactly informative.

If I was to describe the sound to someone... I would say its "heart & soul", because the music that I make is from my heart, and the lyrics I write are from my soul.

LOL. THANKS FOR CLEARING THAT UP, KIDDO. Which one has failed to grasp the concept of contractions?

But basically the only thing that matters to me this week is Joe's haircut. Nick was looking amazingggg all summer and Joe has finally caught up. These two adorable, fey, teen wet dreams have MAGICALLY BLOSSOMED into buff, douchey frat boys. Who still CUDDLE and HUG and STAY UP LATE AT NIGHT TALKING ABOUT THEIR HOPES AND DREAMS. WHO COULD ASK FOR ANYTHING MORE?

( This is what I will spend my twelve hour drive home tomorrow thinking about. )

I was going to let this mind-blowingly epic three and a half minutes of WTF go unmentioned, but then mediaville suggested that Nick did it because Joe let him fuck him afterwards, and then she said something about Joe wearing a BUTT PLUG, which is my personal kink kryptonite. So the following just kind of happened. I'M SORRY, EVERYONE.


O is for Opportunity. Nick/Joe, NC-17, 2,800 words. PWP to the extreme.

( 'Oh my God,' Nick says. 'You're not serious.' )

Ahahaha, people I know online always tell me that I'm MYSTERIOUS, so I thought maybe I should do this meme. One day I will make one of those ~introduction~ posts for my LJ, since I do such a crappy job of actually... talking about... myself... but in the meantime:

The problem with LJ: we all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other. So I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Ask away.

Comments are screened! I will answer anything that doesn't involve my street address or social security number.

I make ABSOLUTELY NO PROMISES, but seeing as my brain really wants to write and is having trouble glomming onto anything in particular:

Poll #1470718 Gimme some sugar.
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: None, participants: 14

Prompt me! Anything is welcome, just give me some ideas.

Ugh. I really want to buy these boots, but I can't quite convince myself to. They are a JESSICA SIMPSON design! What have I been reduced to! And yet they're so effing cool. The buckle gives them a motorcycle look that I really like. Most of the tall black boots I've found look a little skanky, but these are TUFF. I got these Frye boots last fall, but seeing as they are A) brown and B) not as structured as you might hope, they aren't the easiest thing to incorporate into the ol' wardrobe. They generally dress an outfit down instead of up, which is WEIRD for boots. But these black ones look like you could wear them with just about anything. UGH. JESSICA SIMPSON. WHY DO YOU DO THESE THINGS TO ME. (Ahaha, the style is called "Clancey", which just makes me think of the Old King Clancy episode of HIMYM. Canadiansexacts.org! They just really want to get the information out there.)

I've been having a weird few days. For a while there I felt IN THE ZONE, but I haven't slept well the last couple of nights and I'm starting to get frustrated with myself. I have ADD, which I only discovered about a year ago, and while I have it under control now it still occasionally kicks my ass. I never get hyperactive, I just have a lot of trouble thinking clearly and quickly. It's really hard for me to interact with people because I drift in and out of the conversation and lose track of what they're saying. IDK, it's very strange. I probably just need to up my meds until my brain deigns to start working again. SIGH.

( Some thoughts on The Office and JONAS. )

Here, universe, have some off the cuff porn! I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore.

A Place for Every Part of You. Nick/Joe, NC-17, 3,800 words, D/s kink(!). No one else fusses like Joe, who acts like Nick is his pet or something. Time for Nick to rest, time for Nick to get a hug. Time to take Nick for a walk.

( 'You're too serious,' Joe's always huffing at him. )

Oh man, it's RAINING FIC around here. I wrote a bunch of random Nick/Joe commentfic for the current boyfriends_fic challenge, which I have reposted here: The Jonas Safe House for Wayward Clones. It's like 5,000 words of ridiculousness and porn, half Nick/Joe/Nick (the second Nick is fourteen) and half Nick/Joe/Joe (the second Joe is seventeen).

And as for this next one... I have a real weakness for weddings and everything they entail, and I've wanted hot best man on best man action ever since Kevin said that Joe and Nick were going to share the title. So the following was kind of inevitable. Thanks to novaberry and valiant for reading through it for me!


Bells Will Ring. Nick/Joe, NC-17, 5,000 words. Warning for alcohol consumption! "Come on, dude. Kevin only gets married once."
(Bonus: Frank Sinatra - The Way You Look Tonight, the soundtrack to the first half of this story.)

( The wedding is small by Jonas standards, which means that it's kind of huge. )

The Jonas Safe House for Wayward Clones. Nick/Joe/Nick, Nick/Joe/Joe, NC-17, 5,200 words. Written for boyfriends_fic, originally posted here.

prompt: bb!Nick and bb!Joe meet their current day selves, for whatever reasons (no one cares!), and cuddling and groping and hi-jinks ensue.

( They look over at him with the same expression. )

I think it goes without saying that all of this Roman Polanski shit is ridiculous. I tend to exist in a fairly media-free bubble, given that I don't have cable and the only news programs I make time to watch are, uh, fake ones on Comedy Central. But this issue hits pretty close to home and has been virtually unavoidable, and the whole thing makes me sick. Our society's pervasive blame-the-victim mentality has never been quite as obvious as it is right now, and as the former victim of a sex crime I'm really just appalled.

In some ways, though, it's almost refreshing to see the ugly face of the patriarchy exposed. All too often it's taken for granted that we live in a safe, modern world of forward-thinking values, where villains are easily spotted and justice is quickly served. And we DON'T. We don't live in that kind of world at all. We live in an ugly, fucked-up world where people do terrible things and other people excuse their behavior because they don't know how to deal with it. We live in a world where women come forward about their experiences with rape and assault and are shunned within their families, schools and towns. We live in a world where women are still treated as less than men, and it's easier to throw around words like "bitch", "slut", and "hysterical" than it is to to acknowledge the wrong-doings of a man. And, the most bitter pill of all, we live in a reality where human beings are complex, layered creatures capable of doing both very good and very bad things in the same lifetime.

Child molesters often go years without being caught, or never get caught at all, because they have vibrant personalities and charm the people around them. The most common are the people you'd never suspect, not creepers who live alone and drive white vans. They reel in everyone around them -- their victims, their families, their coworkers and friends -- with charisma and wit and generosity. And all too often the communities they dwell in respond the exact way the media has responded to Polanski -- with utter disbelief that quickly gives way to denial. He's such a great guy! He's so nice and friendly! What about all the good stuff he's done! They forgive the person so they can forgive themselves for being tricked. It's an understandable knee-jerk reaction, because it's SCARY to realize that anyone could be the bad guy. What do you even do with that? It requires a lot of soul-searching and reevaluation of everything you know about the world. But what's even scarier is sticking your head in the sand and rejecting the idea, because then you become part of the problem.

My heart really goes out to the woman who has spent her entire life in the middle of this circus. It's horrifying that she had to go through it in the first place, and beyond belief that she's now being chastised by celebrities, politicians and journalists. But the silver lining I'm clinging to is that maybe this will make people stop and think. Maybe women who dismiss feminism as a thing of the past will realize how far we have to go. Maybe the next time a girl comes forward about an attacker who is beloved by many, someone in her life will realize that, yes, it is possible that he did it. Maybe our society will wake up to the deeply ingrained problems that we so often congratulate ourselves on overcoming. If even a handful of people who never gave these issues much thought are horrified by the blatant, almost hyperbolic Polanski apologists, some good has come out of it.

Oh, also? I've been having a good time fantasizing about this guy being thrown in with the general population of a federal prison. We can always count on convicted felons to not let questions of HIGH ART cloud the simple fact that people who diddle children need to get what's coming to them.

So... how about those Jonas Brothers? *_*

This was mostly for novaberry, who wanted Nick/Joe set in the early days of the band. Much thanks to valiant for the beta!

All The Good Things Still To Come. Nick/Joe, NC-17, 12,000 words. This is how everything changes. This is how people get weird.

( The first time it happened, Joe was sixteen. )

Yikes, I accidentally wrote meta. This is rare for me. I feel so... OVER INVESTED! And to top that off, I finally have something to say that is squee-positive. This might be the first time in the history of the universe that I'm the person least likely to harsh your squee. :O

( Spoilers & long-windedness about SPN 5.03. )

Rhetorical question of the day: why are icon makers so adamant about people crediting their personal journals rather than their graphics communities, when this just adds the extra step of hunting around personal journals for a link to the community? >:[

I think this pet peeve stems from the fact that I find most people's layouts confusing and hard to navigate. In addition to having questionable eyesight genes, I spent my formative years squinting at bright laptop screens in dark rooms, so I just cannot DEAL with your tiny blue font on a black background, or whatever. I have the ?style=mine script on my toolbar and I'm not afraid to use it, but still. Let's be logical about this.


ANYWAY. Let's talk about CLOTHES.

( Some picspam and nattering about stuff I want. Nay, stuff that I NEED. )

Man, I haven't been moved AT ALL by any of the celebrity deaths in recent months, but I actually felt sad about Patrick Swayze. One of the few things that got me through my ridiculously difficult freshman year of college was Dirty Dancing. BIZARRELY ENOUGH. I bought it as a joke on a Wal-Mart run one day, and somehow it wound up getting watched more than any of my other movies. Everyone would see it on my bookshelf and be like, "WHAT? DIRTY DANCING?! LET'S DO IT!" I don't think I had ever seen it all the way through before that year, so every time I see a DD reference I think back to that stressful year and how... every now and then... the clouds magically parted and Swayze's tight pants made everything better.

:'(

Anyway, then I did some memes.

My username is: nutkin! As in Squirrel Nutkin, the Beatrix Potter character. The purpose is twofold, as I think squirrels are really cute, and I also enjoy heckling fandom from my lofty perch in a tree. I registered this account back in 2002, and when I decided to take a fresh stab at fandom in 2006 it seemed fitting.

My journal name is: TAKE THIS, CARVER EDLUND. It's something valiant said during a conversation about writing SPN fic, while I was working on this long and now brutally Jossed post-s4 story that had to do with Chuck's books. I feel like it properly summarizes my attitude towards SPN, especially in the wake of the show's "Sam/Dean is gross" agenda.

My title is: Legend of a Cowgirl, the name of that 90s song by Imani Copola. I randomly remembered that it was my favorite song when I was about twelve and downloaded it, and was like, DAMN, THIS IS A GREAT JAM! So I had it on repeat for a solid week in June. sdflkjsdf

My subtitle is: This is not America's Next Top Best Friend. LOL FOREVER. This is a quote from Jade, the ANTM Cycle 6 contestant who looked like a praying mantis and was incredibly bitchy. It's one of my favorite quotes because it reminds me that it's perfectly okay to say and do things that not everyone will agree with. We don't all need to be BFF in order to co-exist and do our thing. I am not exactly a shit-stirrer, but I always feel free to say, "hey, this episode sucked," or whatever. I slap my forehead when I see people tip-toe around their actual opinions and feelings in order to keep an imagined status quo. I know people in fandom (myself included) feel pressure to either squee or STFU, but I think if everyone cowboyed up and stopped worrying about stepping on other people's toes, it would be a much more interesting place.

My friends page is called: Friends. Ahaha, I never gave my flist a customized name. Oops?

My default userpic: Demi Lovato being gorgeous. I actually got this icon before I really paid attention to her, just because it was so pretty. I've developed a bit of a crush on Demi lately, though. :"> I think she's remarkably sweet and down to earth.


Because this is the season of memes, here's another one!

01. Comment to this entry saying 'ICONS!' and I will pick 6 of your icons.
02. Make an entry in your own journal and talk about the icons I picked!

jamesinboots gave me these: ( Ta-da! )

Now that I've had time for a rewatch, ( spoilers/reactions to SPN 5.01 )

I can't believe it's September! Fall is really upon us. I'm always overwhelmed with the urge to buy school supplies and clothes this time of year, even when I have absolutely no reason to. My kingdom for the smell of a fresh pack of number 2 pencils. *_*

So Driving Down the Darkness, my SPN season one coda, was selected for spnroundtable's book club discussion this month. Nice! I've always had a lot of fondness for that story. I wrote it right at the peak of my SPN obsession, when I really had a lot of things to say about the universe and ideas that I wanted to explore. In retrospect there are a lot ways it could have been tightened up, but it still makes me happy that I wrote something that spanned the entirety of season one. SEASON ONE! It seems so arcane now, on the eve of S5.

Speaking of Supernatural, I've been thinking lately that I want to see a SPN friending meme. I know there are SO MANY people in this fandom that I don't know, and I'd love to make some new SPN friends as we head into the new season. I saw this one today, but it seemed heavily biased in its questions -- ie, "Are you a Sam fan? If so, why?" HAHA, DNW. Does anyone know of a less biased friending meme going down? SHOULD I MAKE ONE?? Does anyone else but me want new friends?

sdlkjf Tonight I accidentally introduced my five-year-old nephew to PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME, and eight viewings later it is INGRAINED IN MY BRAIN. I am never going to recover.

For some reason I keep getting email notifications about my files on Box.net being downloaded. Which I guess means people have been downloading my fanmixes en masse this week? skjdf I don't know what is up with that, but it's WEIRD. Enjoy the Aly & AJ, guys!! That one always gets an LOL from me.

So, I have been doing nothing lately but wallow in Jonas Brothers obsession. IDK how that one happened! I started paying attention to them last spring, and I guess it's taken this long for my interest to transiton to full-on FIXATION. I find myself watching episodes of their stupid sitcom on YouTube at one in the morning, and singing along to their music in the car. This picture somehow became the wallpaper on my new phone...? And for some reason I keep turning it on just to see them because their dumb little faces make me happy...? I'VE EXPERIENCED THIS BEFORE. THIS IS A NEW FANDOM TAKING OVER MY LIFE. >:[

I gotta say, though, their new album really isn't that bad. I found most of their earlier stuff virtually unlistenable, but there are a couple of solid pop songs on this one. Granted, I have genuinely enjoyed songs by Vanessa Hudgens (see: the Aly & AJ reference two paragraphs up), but I think that if they just gave their lyrics a few more passes I could REALLY and TRULY make a case for their music. As it is, the bad slant rhymes and slang reduce it to fun guilty pleasure. It took about a week before I could listen to "Much Better" without my eye twitching when "enemies" is rhymed with "BFFs eternally". WHAT? WHY? It's so unnecessary!

Anyway, the point is that I'm clearly getting way too invested. And LOVING IT. It's novel to actually be excited about fandom shit again!